Week 17: Nothing to Wear?

Sorry about the long wait since my last post and today I have two. We recently went on a shopping trip south of the border to take advantage of the great Canadian Dollar. My wife sure did well. She is now all decked out and looking even more gorgeous than ever. I also get a daily email form What to Expect. I thought the post I got today sure matched with our shopping trip.

It's official — your belly is big and getting bigger! It's time to raid your partner's closet for oversize shirts and sweats, and your gal pals' attics for maternity clothes that are gently used and begging to be borrowed. Swapping maternity clothes is a time-honored bonding ritual, so go for it (you can return the favor by passing them on to someone else when you're done). Going shopping? Don't overdo it. A couple of pairs of good-quality maternity pants, skirts, and tops should see you through many a month (especially if you buy well-coordinated separates that can generate many an outfit).

Also a special thank you to the person that sent me the book in the mail. I got this book from someone that replies to posts on this site and I visit their blog as well. Thank you again! It is entitled The Expectant Father: Facts, Tips, and Advice for Dads-to Be by Armin A. Brott and Jennifer Ash. I will make sure to post what I am reading about in other posts. Are there any other books that you would recommend?

Fetal development in Pregnancy Week 17

I got this post from Baby Gaga. They send me a new post every week. It sure helps us learn about what is happening. Before the post I thought you needed a laugh. What do you think of the cartoon?

Don't be too shocked but... your baby is EVEN bigger than it was last week, not to mention getting cuter, and smarter every day! As you’ve come to expect, there’s no shortage of growth and development this week: your fantastic little bean stalk has added yet another half inch to their overall height-- making them nearly half a foot long! Their little limbs have reached (or are within one week of) their relative proportions, and will continue to grow evenly with the rest of the body after this week. Reactive listening has begun for your baby, even though their ears are not yet structurally complete or fully functional. Meanwhile, different parts of their astonishingly complex brain are developing to process your little one’s hearing and other senses, (you know, sight, smell, taste and touch). Mind boggling factoid of the week: if you’re having going to have a little girl, her ovaries have already produced millions of primordial egg cells, which, within a few weeks, will develop into actual eggs! Phew… just wait till she’s a teenager eh?

And how's mom doing?
Even though the second trimester is often characterized as the most enjoyable of the three, you can count on a few ailments (see week 14 for additional tri-2 symptoms). This week, or in the coming weeks, you may be privy to the uncommon joys of “round ligament pain.” These not-so-lovely symptoms can doctors advise sleeping on your left side as lying on your back can compress your pelvic veins, decreasing blood return to the lower half of your body include bellyaches, pain in the lower abdomen and sharp shooting and/or stabbing pains, most often expressed at the end of the day. Your suffering is due to stretched ligaments and muscles that support your ever-growing uterus. This is to be expected and is perfectly normal (especially since your uterus is only getting bigger!). Some doctors advise sleeping on your left side as lying on your back can compress your pelvic veins, decreasing blood return to the lower half of your body. Lying on your left side relieves this pressure thereby allowing normal blood flow. If this doesn’t do the trick, go ahead and consult your health care practitioner, but try not to punch them when they serenely tell you it’s normal to feel stabbing pain during this time. As we all know, violence never solves anything.

30 Tips for New Dads

I was sent an email today from Abel Cheng who gave me permission to post the article below. It can be also found on the website Parent Wonder. It is entitled:



30 Tips for New Dads: Being the Best Father You Can Be Before, During, and After Delivery

Any proud papa would be excited and expectant about the impending arrival of a new baby. For him, however, he has the added anxiety of seeing his partner go through discomfort, mood swings, pain, morning sickness, childbirth and so on, not knowing how he can really be of assistance. Well here is a checklist of things that are of wonderful benefit to an expectant Mom … even if she may not realize it at the time.

During the pregnancy

1. Jobs, big and small: When your partner is pregnant, one of the most important things you can do for her is to offer support, understanding and able-bodied assistance. From simple jobs such as stacking the dishwasher to more high-expectation tasks such as buying sanitary products for use in hospital, a new Dad-to-be should be the calming influence.

2. Just be there: When she’s irritable and uncomfortable, having a haven at home can be bliss. Try to keep in mind why she’s irritable and do your best to smooth things over. After all, she’s weighed down and not feeling the best so try to soften the impact.

3. The lovely foot rub: Fluid retention and swollen legs are par for the course in pregnancy. A foot rub can be as valuable as a diamond necklace to a pregnant woman, especially if it’s done with love. Similarly, a shoulder massage or even allowing her some time off her feet will be just as welcome.

4. Take an interest: Browsing the baby aisle at the supermarket may not be your idea of retail therapy but your partner will swoon at the very sight of pretty bibs, adorable bootees and colorful linen. If she asks your opinion, try to give a well-formed one instead of shrugging “I don’t know, Darling”.

5. Prenatal classes: Particularly if it’s your first baby, your partner will want to attend prenatal classes so that the whole pregnancy/childbirth scenario is not a shock to the system. It’s important that you attend along with her, not just to learn the same things but also to show your support for what she will be going through physically.

6. Car seat: In most places, the law states that you are not permitted to take a new baby from the hospital without having a regulation car seat installed securely in the car. This could be your job. Either go shopping together or take it upon yourself to research and buy the baby carrier/car seat and have it installed so that it’s ready, whenever the baby is born.

7. The nursery: Naturally, setting up the nursery is something you’ll want to discuss and do together. Make it a priority so that it’s one less thing to think about as the pregnancy enters the final stages. Painting should be done early on and other furnishings can be arranged as the money is available or when on sale. Help hang curtains, install shelves and generally prepare the nursery for readiness.

8. Attend doctor’s visits: You won’t know the wonder of seeing your very own baby growing and developing in your partner’s belly unless you go along to one or more of the prenatal visits to the doctor. If you miss all other appointments, make sure you don’t miss the ones that include an ultrasound examination. Why not go out for lunch afterwards and make a real event of it?

9. Plan the road ahead: Planning is one of your jobs too. You need to plan contingencies for the sudden onset of labor, including the route to the hospital and who will look after any other children in the house at a moment’s notice. You need to make sure the car is read and gassed up for the trip and that you can take time off work when the baby is to be born. You also should plan financially, taking into account insurance, medical costs and expenses once the baby is born.

10. Remember your relationship: Once the baby enters the world, your relationship is likely to change. Now is the time to cement the love that you have for each other and talk about the demands that will be upon you both after the birth. Act now to remind each other of romance and the partnership that you share.

Labor and delivery

Here comes the big challenge! Watching your loved one go through agony and frustration can be tormenting but remember, there is a grand prize at the end.

11. Be supportive: Above all, your partner will be leaning on you for support. That means holding her hand, helping her walk, massaging her back, calling the nurse, feeding her drinks of water, reminding her of her breathing, timing contractions, helping her to the bathroom and all manner of other considerations. It may not be easy but it will definitely be appreciated.

12. Be prepared to feel like you’re in the way: It’s common for Dads in delivery rooms to feel as though they’re the ‘third wheel’, that they’re in the way and of no use. Nothing could be further from the truth (unless you make a nuisance of yourself). You are witness to everything that is going on. You may choose to cut the umbilical cord, you may be called upon to make important decisions and you will, most importantly, meet your new baby at the end of the proceedings. You are every bit as important as your partner; just be prepared to take somewhat of a back seat.

13. Offer help: Whether or not it’s required, offer assistance where it appears to be needed. Your partner and the professionals on hand will gladly accept if they know you are willing and able.

14. Don’t panic: Try to remain calm and level-headed throughout the delivery. If you feel as though you are going to faint or lose your composure, remove yourself from the environment, and return when you feel better.

15. Be the messenger: Everyone – family and friends – will be anxious to hear news. If the delivery is taking longer than expected, it will be up to you to keep everyone informed so that they don’t worry.

16. Step in if necessary: If you feel that something is not going according to the way you and your partner had planned, say so. Your partner may be too exhausted to speak up and will be relying on you to be the spokesman for both of you. Similarly, if you are concerned about her safety or wellbeing, or that of the baby, you must raise your concerns immediately.

17. Cut the cord: What a beautiful moment it is to help deliver your new child. Cutting the umbilical cord is symbolic of your profound role as father and welcoming your baby into the world. If you don’t feel up to it, just say so and hold your partner’s hand instead. But if you do want to do it, mention it to the delivering doctor early in the piece and remind him once the baby is born.

18. Bath the baby: Fathers are taking on more involvement in their children’s deliveries these days. Some are even comfortable with bathing the new baby post-delivery and it can be a lovely experience for the mother to look on as she recovers from the birth. The nurse will help you every step of the way if you require it.

19. Tell your wife how proud of her you are: When the big moment has finally arrived, there can be almost a sensation of disappointment as the excitement dies down. The doctor goes off to attend to another patient, the baby has stopped crying and everyone appears busy with other tasks. Now’s the time to share a special moment with your partner. Tell her how amazed you were at what she managed to achieve and tell her how much you love her.

20. Share the good news: Offering cigars after the birth of a new baby is not done so much anymore, but everyone appreciates a phone call telling them the exciting news. If possible, pass the phone to your partner if she feels up to talking to friends and relatives.

After the baby is born

You’ve endured the pregnancy together, survived the delivery together and now you have a future to look forward to with your new baby. Here too, there are things you can do to be the best father you can be.

21. Share in the care: On nights when you have to work the next day, your sleep is important but when you have the next day off, it can be a huge relief to take over the night feeds or, if your partner is breastfeeding, keep her company during feeds.

22. Support her feeding choices: For some women, breastfeeding comes naturally; for others, it’s a struggle from the first attempt. Whatever your partner chooses to do with regard to feeding, support her choice and back her up in front of others.

23. Help around the house: If you haven’t been a housework helper in the past, now is the time to change that, even if it’s until your partner is feeling like her old self again. Doing the shopping, vacuuming the floor and preparing meals are huge contributions at this point in time.

24. Change diapers: Come on, it’s not that hard! Imagine if you were left to change every single diaper. Taking a break from it is a delight so if you can afford your partner that opportunity now and then, she’ll adore you.

25. Screen visitors: A new baby does not mean a free-for-all on visiting hours. Your partner needs rest and your baby needs to adjust to a routine. Discourage spontaneous drop-ins and late-stayers with as much respect and poise as possible. Let them know that they are more than welcome at a particular time and ‘for an hour or so’ until everyone’s settled.

26. Be the hero: Contrary to the popular image of besotted, doting mothers, new Moms are often tired, stressed and hard to please. This passes so do your best to bear with it and maintain your understanding nature. Defend her to others and be her hero as much as possible. This will ensure that life returns to normal peacefulness sooner rather than later.

27. Try to be home on time: Work is vital to keep the income flowing in, but right now, you also need to concentrate on that work/life balance. Make every effort to be home on time until a routine is established.

28. Get to know your beautiful child: You have a new son or daughter. The responsibility can seem overwhelming but don’t forget to enjoy him or her. Every day is a precious gift so spend time getting to know your little one. Play, talk, feed, watch … they change very quickly, don’t miss out.

29. Count your blessings: Look around you. You have a partner who has given you the gift of a son or daughter and you yourself have helped to create a brand new life. Whether you have the world at your feet or you are making do with second hand nursery furniture, be thankful for what you have and encourage your family to feel that way as well.

30. Be the Dad you want to be: Not every father is hands-on and not all new Dads go ga-ga over tiny babies. What matters is that you can be relied upon and that you love your family. Compromises can always be made on specific roles and tasks.

Enjoy your family and revel in how it makes you feel. One day you may want to create another little addition so pave the way now for a comfortable, secure relationship by being a great Dad today.

What are your thoughts and experiences about this article form either a male or female perspective?

Your Nose Always Knows: Nasal Stuffiness

I got the information below from the What to Expect website. You can sign up and they will send you information about what is happening both to the mother and the little one. I find the information to be interesting.

"Popping out of your clothes yet? You're getting to the point (if you're not there already) where the bulge in your belly says "baby" and not "fat." If you haven't been able to feel the top of your uterus yet, try again this week. Feel for it about three inches below your belly button.

But your uterus is not the only thing that's starting to swell. The mucous membranes of your nose may also start to swell from all the pregnancy hormones circulating in your body, which are also increasing blood flow there. The result? Your nose probably already knows: congestion, and possibly even nosebleeds. Unfortunately, the stuffiness may only get worse as your pregnancy progresses, but your practitioner will probably not prescribe any medications or antihistamine nasal sprays to help clear things up (but do ask if he or she recommends something else instead). You can safely try saline sprays or nasal strips, especially if the congestion takes a turn for the truly uncomfortable. A humidifier in your room and a little petroleum jelly dabbed under your nose may also help overcome the dryness associated with any congestion."

How common are nosebleeds and congestion. I am just starting to notice that my wife is congested?

A Scare with a Happy Ending: Fetal Doppler

Monday started out as one of those days that you hope you never have. We had a scheduled appointment with a specialist that we have been seeing after we lost our first pregnancy. The doctor went over all of our tests and things looked like they were going well. He then decided to use the fetal doppler to check for the baby's heart beat. He was unable to find one. I felt our hearts drop and began to think about what happened last time. Not again, I kept thinking. The doctor called the Ultrasound clinic and unable to get us in for an appointment until Wednesday. He indicated that it was still early and that he did not like to use the fetal doppler. The look on his face did not make me feel any better.

I know that waiting until Wednesday was not going to work, so we went down to the ultrasound clinic to see if we could get in any earlier. The lady at the desk said there may be a cancellation. She new what happened last time and told us that she would call us if something opened up, but could not promise anything. She did call a few hours latter and we did get in, I guess I can not complain about our health care system. I still can't believe that we got in. We went into the clinic scared and not sure what to expect. Well........ as they say a picture is worth a million words:



As you can see things worked out. The baby positioning caused us not to be able to hear the heartbeat when using the fetal doppler. We were able to hear the heartbeat during the ultrasound (music to our ears) but do to the positioning they could not determine if we are having a boy or a girl, only time will tell. Life could not be any better. What are your experiences with fetal dopplers?

The Future of Our Children

I came across these two video while doing some work. It sure makes me think about the future world that our children will be living in. Changing jobs and global competition (the flattening of the world) is already taking place. How we raise and educate our children will be a lot different than we were accustomed too. Even this blog has amazed me because I am able to chat with people from all over the world. Talk about a great audience to get advice for a couple expecting for the first time. Or am I wrong? What are your thoughts?

Second Trimester

Well we made it to our second trimester and things seem to be going well! I found the following information and picture from Parents.com. This week, our baby's sex organs will continue to grow more sophisticated. If we're having a girl, her ovaries are moving down into her pelvis. If it's a boy, his prostate forms this week. Our baby's thyroid, an important hormone-producing gland that regulates metabolism, starts working this week -- a crucial step for the rest of his development. Some other cool stuff to note: The roof of its tiny mouth is fully formed, and its constant sucking reflexes are helping to create full, cherubic cheeks. Right now, our baby is nearly 3 1/2 inches long and weighs about an ounce -- but in just two months' time, it will double in length and reach the impressive weight of one whole pound! This is truly amazing! What else can we expect in the second trimester?

Avoiding Constipation While You Are Pregnant

I got my weekly email from Parenting Weekly. This week focused on constipation and pregnancy. Below you will find some of the tips that they offer.

Constipation is, unfortunately, a common problem for pregnant women. Here are some ways to avoid this painful and frustrating situation:

• Drink more fluid than normal. Carry water bottles with you and try to consume at least 10 to 12 glasses of water every day.
• Reduce or eliminate caffeine consumption. Caffeine acts as a diuretic and eliminates much of the water you need for smooth digestion.
• Stay active by walking at least 20 minutes each day.
• Gradually add fiber-rich foods, which act as a natural laxative, to your diet.

Do you have any other suggestions that may work?